Monday, July 30, 2018

39....

10s.... it was my BIG birthday this past week.  I am no longer a young lady but a mature... 39.  39!  One more year closer to 40.  The BIG 4-0!  Eeeps!
This will be the 3rd time I have stated this phrase....
39 is going to be my year.
I have no idea what that even means or what I am going to be doing to make 39 "my year", but I am sure that it will be exciting!
I wanted to do a little post about 39 things that I have learned about life (but hello, I am learning new things erryday), and then I thought maybe I would blog about 39 things I want to do with my year (but then I thought, what if I do not even mark 3 things off of the list.... I will later feel like when the 4-0 comes a knocking that I spent year 3-9 not making it, but wasting it.  Ya dig?
Welp, here goes nothing..... These are my hopes for the year.
Some of you may read this list and be like.....wha????  That is super lame.
My husband may read this list and be like.....  a lil stressed!
Others may read this and laugh about it.... but I wanna make it happen (or at least, try)!  Some of the things might be little, like a simple thing for you, but if it is on my list... it might be a BIG thing for me to just put forth the effort to get it done (so don't be judging)!
1.  I have already tried to put this into play, but I am trying to have a gentler tone with my people.  Trying to hold my tongue, instead of making a smart remark (to my manfriend), and trying to watch my tone instead of addressing my littles with anger.  I am sure none of you do this!  Sometimes, after a long day, I am tired.  I want to come home and relax, but everyone else is needing my attention.  I sometimes (most times) get a bit frazzled and just fa-reek out!  I have noticed day by day that my people sometimes do this too (well hello.... wonder where they have seen that nut-ball behavior??)  I would like to say their father (insert laughing face) but much does come from their mutha!  It is crazy, I try to be so patient, kind, and calm to others... but when it comes to my own people, I can sometimes lose it!  So, first thing on the list.... have a softer heart to those who love me most and best.  The time I am spending with them is small (considering my time at work) and then we are only spending about 4-5 waking hours together.  Be kind

2.  Those 4-5 hours during the week go by quickly.  Not talking weekends, but with school starting back things will be crazy busy.  Getting homework done, extra curriculars, and any other things that pop up in the week.  I am always saying how I want to be more intentional with my time, but here we go..... when we are awake I want to be immersed in my people.  I do not want to be the momma at the table with the phone in her face... looking at what others might be doing with their day or for their dinner (I can do that after all of my people are asleep).
On Saturday morning, Sophia and I went to the grocery store, and on the way home she was saying how she really does like spending time with me.  I smiled, because our conversations are usually interrupted by little brother, the tv, or just a few moments of quiet.  She then asked if when we got home, could she and I take a little walk around the block.  She said that she knew I had to get the groceries out and get the dogs walked before the rain (so she already understood I had stuff to do, but thought she would ask anyways).  I pulled in the garage, opened her door and headed for the sidewalk.  She was confused (since there were ice cream sandwiches in the back of the car)…. but I just told her that those things were not important.... she was most important and my time with her is the most special thing I have.  She held my hand the whole way around the block.
I need more times like this with my people, making sure that they know they are important.

3.  I would like to date my manfriend.
Ha!  Seems silly now that I type that, but it is something that I am really needing to do.

Here we are going on year 12 (wha…….???) and I feel like our time together (alone) is a rarity!  The whole reason I got into this whole marriage deal was because of him... his nice smile.... his kind heart.... his love for talking (just kidding), but we started this whole thing together, and I don't ever want us to get so bogged down with the not fun stuff (chores, finances, taking people to and fro, lack of sleep, work) that we start to lose our spark.  In the past, dating for us has been when we have an extra few bucks or, once every few months, or maybe it is someone's birthday or a BIG event, but we should start making our relationship a priority!!  No pressure... manfriend!!
Pencil me in next week....

4.  Sunday!  Yesterday, my family gathered at my Moss' (that is a great-grandmother) home for dinner.  My sister had just gotten home from her 9 weeks away at KALEO and we have recently moved my Moss into a new place (in a lil retirement community).  It has already been a BIG summer.  Anyways, dinner was good and it was a nice time just to come together for a bit and catch up.  One thing I remember growing up was going to my grandparents house for Sunday lunch.  We would go out after church, have a lunch (that looking back, I am wondering if my MamMaw started prepping it on Thursday), and my whole family was there.  Aunts.  Uncles.  Cousins. Grands. Sometimes even friends of theirs.  Their dining table was always full, the kitchen table would hold the spread and I would sit at the kid table (because, hello.... I was a child)!  Memories.  I loved it growing up, and after Sunday dinner yesterday... I have made a firm decision that I am bringing back family lunch/ dinner!!  Whose coming over for dinner???

5.  Speaking of Sunday dinner.... let's talk about my Sunday mornings, that have been lazily spent not taking my family to church.  Sunday is coming.... and it is time for us to be back at church.  Sometimes after the loooooong week, I am anxious for just a day to be lazy, but my choice to be lazy is time that I need to have my children and myself in the church.  I grew up in the church.  If the doors were open, we were in the building.  My mother volunteered, we were in Sunday school, did choir, ect…. and I cannot believe that I have been so lax about this the past months!  I can def tell that something has been missing in our days... and it is a whole lotta Jesus.

A few months ago, the kids went forward at a church event and asked Jesus to come into their heart and be the Lord and Savior of their lives.  It was such an amazing moment, and one that we had discussed with them for awhile.  I do not want them to forget that moment but build on that relationship with God and learning the word and keeping that in their hearts.  This is the most important thing that I can do for my children.

6.  With all of the above... me trying to be so present with all of my people, Sunday dinners, and more time at church, and dating my manfriend, I know the 10s of you are thinking... hello, I will have no free time!  Ha!  I guess I will just have to be really particular about my time!
For the past few years, I have really wanted to focus on being healthier, try to work out, get my super model bod started!  Well, life gets in the way and I sometimes have to take a back seat because of everyone else's needs!  When I turn 40.... I want to look a bit different!  Physically!  What if I shoot to lose 30... 25... 20 pounds.  It is possible.  It is a toddler, but it is possible!  Ever since ye ole broke leg thing, and let's be honest the whole year of 2015/2016, I just kinda have pulled an Elsa and "Let It Go"!  Letting myself go.
I take my supplements that I love, but I am not always putting the best stuff in my body!  So, maybe what I am putting in is working against the good I am trying to do!
Not today!
Time for a change.  I am going to try to shed 20 pounds by July 27th 2019!!
It is out there.... in the universe!

7.  Talk about letting myself go.... I just got my hair done a few weeks ago, and it had not been done in over a year!  My hair was brown and gray... not a good combo!  I was looking a bit sad with my weird dirty blonde hombre look.  That little bit of self care made me feel good.  It put a bit of a pep in my step, and made me feel like my old self.  I would like to start doing a little bit more of taking care of me!  Get my hair done.  Go on a walk.  Take a nap.  Get my nails done
Make mommy a priority.

8.  Get my nails done!  Ha, how about stop biting my nails!  It is not a good look.

9.  Manfriend... ignore this.... I wanna re-paint my kitchen cabinets, and the ones in the laundry room.  There, I said it.  It might take me a month of late late nights, but I am ready for a new look in the kitchen!

10.  What is happening in my front and backyard friends?  I have been doing a lot of "talking" about landscaping, but let's be clear.... we ain't sittin' in the lap of luxury over here!  If I could start small, pulling up the weeds, then pulling up the plants that have gotten so large (that are really weeds), dig up the overgrown stuff, trim up some bushes, maybe I could even make some of the flowerbeds larger.... I don't know, but they need help!  It is time for the talking to be put into action!  

11.  This one is big y'all!  I really want to work to pay off debt.  How amazing would it be to be debt free!?  It is a hard pill to swallow, we are working for a paycheck to pay all of these bills, and we don't get to enjoy the things we work so hard to have!  Ughhhh, debt!!  I would love to hear how you are paying off yours!  Any tips for someone getting started??

12.  I would like to get more recent photos printed of our family!  It seems like we had family pictures taken a few years ago, and I have never gotten anything more recently printed!  Ha!  All of our photos are from when the kids were pre-k and a few kinder school pics!  

13.  Also, I would like to organize the kids baby books and photo albums from the years!

14.  Hello, also, have our wedding photo album printed.  During my 6 week stint of bedrest, I uploaded all of our wedding pictures and wanted to do a Shutterfly photo album!  I guess I got tired and never got the book made!  Looks like my nights are going to be busy!!

15.  Get my kids off the pizza, chicken nugget, ketchup diet!  It is time for me to stop making so many meals in the evening and get them eating what manfriend and I eat!!  Tonight we will dine on spaghetti and meatballs!!  That is right... we will all dine on the same meal.  Pray for us, it could be a long night (spent at the kitchen table)!

16.  Dear Chick-fila.... since # 6 is happening, me stopping at your establishment 3 times a week to eat a bacon egg biscuit will have to stop!  We are over, and hopefully the money I will save I can put towards number 11.  Sincerely, Caryn

17.  For that matter.... Dear Sonic and my sweet friend who greets me so chipperly every morning.... I will no longer be stopping by for my Route 44 sweet teas.  I will be saving my $2.64 and be bringing my drinks from home!!  I will forever miss our mornings together, Caryn

18.  Become a little bit more focused on cleanliness.  I am not saying that we are rolling around in filth, but I am saying that I could pay a lil bit more attention to the toilets and kitchen floors!  Maybe if I did just a little bit a day.  Make sure the dishes are washing at the end of the night and not sitting in the sink.  Try keeping up with the laundry and folding it when it comes out of the dryer (do not throw it onto the floor)!  Clean the bathrooms 1 time a week, the next time I get a stomach bug I will forever be thankful for this new attention to cleanliness.

19.  In the spring, I really do want to run in the Gold Rush marathon in our town.  I know that will consist of practice... running.  I have the fall and winter to try to get there so I can do this with the kids and the manfriend in the spring.  It could happen!

19.  Take a road trip.  I had been planning on taking a road trip with the kids to go and visit cousins.  I have been wanting to do this for soooooo long, but taking 2 children in the car, alone!  Shheesh!  I would like to do more fun memory making things with them, and let them make memories with my cousins children!  I loved my time growing up with my cousins.  We had meals together, went to school together, played, vacationed together... and I want my babies to do this stuff too!!

20.  How hard and expensive would it be for me to put hardwood floors in my house (this will not help me get close to number 11, but man.... it will really look nice!  Just saying number 20 may not happen... but if it did, I would not be upset about it.

21.  The blog.... I used to blog more consistently about the days and nights... but it has taken a back seat.  I loved to document the things that were going on with our fam, but there just are not enough minutes in the night!  However, I really want to bring it back!  I do love to look back on posts from a year or years ago, it makes my heart so happy.

22.  Am I done having babies?

I am just going to leave that right there.  It would really cause a hiccup in number 11, number 6, 20, 19, well... a lot of things.  Maybe I am too old, but maybe I am not done.  Manfriend... ignore this.

23.  I want to start reading with the kids at nighttime.  My kids are not big fans of books, however, they are big fans of the ipad.  We need a little less IPAD and a whole lotta reading in our house.

24.  Try connecting with my friends again.  Ugh.... I miss my girlfriends.  I am not bragging, but I kinda had the best friends.  They are the kinds that would do anything for you and just make you better.  We have gotten older, married, have had children... you know had to have grown up lives... but I think it is time that I can have friends and do things with them again.  Maybe a dinner here, drinks, there, maybe start a bunco group that meets 1 time every month.  Sometimes, momma just needs a little bit of girl time.

25.  I need to plan Sophia's birthday party.  This should not really be on the list, but it is something I need to get on!  She will be 9 on the 2nd, and we will be having a birthday party for her in a few weeks.  This is also something I know will get done and will be easy for me to mark off the 39 list!  Boom!!

26.  Try to do more home-cooked meals.  I do enjoy cooking, sometimes I do not always love it, but it is always appreciated by my guy.  If I could at least have the ingredients to make something, so we are not sitting around at 6 trying to figure out what to eat!

27.  Frame my children's artwork.  When I got married, we would go to my SIL's house and she would frame my niece and nephews artwork.  I loved the way they looked and it made the kids so proud that their momma loved it so much that it earned a forever spot on the wall!  I really do like that idea, and it will help clean up the clutter on their dressers and in my cabinets.

28.  I want to master my left and right splits again.  That is right, I have a year to stretch and get my splits back!  FYI, it has been 1998 since I did a split (I was 19) but today I am throwing down the challenge... I will have my splits (hopefully my uterus will not fall out... or if number 22 comes to fruition, it will not fall out)!  It will be filmed!  Get ready!  IT... IS... HAPPENING!!

29.  Hold a plank for longer that 1 minute.  I have been working on this for a week or so, and I can do 2 totaling 40 ish seconds (my counting, not an actual stopwatch counting).

30.  I really want to try yoga.  Where might one start.... is there a good video to try or do you suggest going to do yoga in front of others.... where I look sad (and possibly pee my pants).

31.  Get more organized!  I have a planner.... I just need to use it, you know write important things in there!

32.  Since I am getting organized, it is time to get rid of the junk in my house.  My children do not wear size 5T anymore... so let it go.  I am not going to wear my wedding lingerie.... so let it go.  I am not every going to use that 1/4 of a bottle of detergent in the cabinet.... I do not like the smell of it, so I should let it go.... in fact, it is probably no longer a liquid but has become a hardened substance in the bottle.... let it go!  Our garage needs some attention as well.  Manfriend has been on this for years, but I am a hoarder (I come by this naturally... it is genetic) and I can not let him throw things out... but this year... we will let things go!!

33.  If the phone rings... answer it.  Heck, at least call people back within 24 hours!  It is a struggle and probably why I do not have so many friends!!  If I want time with my friends... I need to be a friend to others.

34.  Invest in others... make sure that they know how much I care for and love them.  Over the past few years, I have witnessed friends (old and new) go through hard times, and if I can be there for them in a small way, just to ease something they are going through, or let them know I care, them I think that is great. I love when people do this for me.

35.  Try not to be so concerned about what others think.

36.  Ride a bike again... to the square.  I will obvi need a cushy seat and a pillow for my parts to sit on!  My town has become a bike riding mecca, and I am 39... and it is time that I take part.  Maybe I could get a lil bike with a basket, to carry my phone in case I fall or almost die.  Some people are riding from our town to another one 30 minutes down the road... I will not be a follower like these people, or join one of their biking gangs, but I do think that I would like to be able to ride a bike... to the square.... from my house.... with my family.

37.  Put something into our savings account.  Anything.  $50.00.  Just something...

38.  Read 10  okay that seems like a lot... maybe 5 books in a year.  I used to be a reader.  At the beach, I even read 2 books (in a week), surely I can read 5 in a year!  Maybe if my children see me less on the FB and more in a real book, then they will be more excited about reading!!  #JustAThought

39.  Be happy.  I know I am posting all of these things that I want to do this year.. this 39th year, but what I really want most is to enjoy this life that I am creating.

39... it is going to be a great year!!




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