The past few weeks have had me feeling like the worst momma ever! When we got pregnant with our miracle babies, I was so over the moon about them, I could not wait to love them to pieces, and do everything to make them happy, and to take care of every single one of their needs. I wanted to be the best mommy ever. I read books, I read mommy blogs, I had friends with babies (I watched them and learned what I should and should not do), I watched Jon and Kate Plus Eight (what? That Kate totally knew what she was doing), i watched that baby birthin' show that came on the discovery channel every morning, I talked to my mom about everything under the sun.... So I figured I was prepared to be a mom (and I knew that when babies are born God also puts in their teeny tiny baby hands a manual that I could read over in case I did not learn it before they came), ha! Well, my teeny tiny babies left that silly "baby manual" in my belly! So, as we are trucking along on through these tough toddler years, I am learning A LOT!
Some of the things I have learned (or still learning)....
1. Some children, my Red, will have terrible allergies, and detergents, soaps, wipes, diapers, lotions, ect. Can wreak havoc on such a teeny body! It makes me so sad:( but we deal with rashes/ eczema and I feel I have much to offer others on their itchy rashy roads!
2. Sometimes, children just scream, cry, and act like crazy people just because! They will embarrass you, cause people to look at you like your a horrible parent for taking them out in public, and make you second guess having them in the first place! Ha!
3. There are things that children will say at the most inopportune time. Things like, "I dont like you" (to a sweet family member who is trying so hard to love on them, mommy your poofy (on a day that you have had 3 hand fulls of cookies and an M&M mix from your local ice cream shop), or any phrase with the word.... poop! Yes, the word poop. My children love to tell people that they have to poop, dung beetles like poop, or mommy has to poop.... Really, children? Is nothing private to them?
4. There are some things that children will not be into... Wearing clothes (they may like to have naked Mondays, Tuesdays, and every days), they may not like to take baths (mine do, this makes me happy, I like clean), and then brushing teeth. Brushing teeth. Yes, I like teeth, my Bucky was a dentist, I like for others to take care of their grills, my children act like I am trying to kill them slowly with a toothbrush and poison paste! When I brush their teeth, it is a rough 20 minutes! We get it done, but Red is not a fan! The Bear is getting better, I think he realizes if we do this quick he can go play!
Well, a few weeks ago, I took the tots to their first dentist appointment ever. I was excited. The kids were excited. I told them there would be a shiny prize for their troubles. We get there and the dentist is lovely, her dental hygienist ladies were super nice, but it all ended when they said my precious Red had cavities, and one was so bad that it would need a crown. ? ? ? It was the worst!
What? I have been trying so hard, and this was my fault, God trusted me to take care of her, love her and hold her, and brush her teeth. Really, it was a total mom fail moment. How could I cause this and now she would be the person to deal with the pain of it. I cried at the appointment. I made them all uncomfortable, I'm sure. I cried the whole way home. I just felt like I did this, and did I mention she would have to be under anesthesia to get them fixed?! A mess I say!
Well, Wednesday was her big appointment. She knew nothing, of course, she's 3! After the procedure she woke up and by the end of the day she was running, chatting it up, back to herself. When the procedure ended, the dentist (over the practice) came to speak to Aron and I, and let me know, this was not my fault and I am not a bad mother (she has weak enamel and her back teeth had fissures (not my fault) and this issue developed while she was cooking in my oven). They were so kind to say that to me, because I had been struggling with that feeling of failure for 3 weeks.
All of this being said, Sweet Sophia has a permanent "princess crown" not on her head, but in her mouth! she is doing well, and has no clue they are there, such a praise! In fact, Miss Thang has been pulling her princess charm all day.
We left the house for a little bit today and the kids made it home with ba-woons (aka balloons).
who needs toys, my boy has played with this ba-woon all day long.
My reflection over the past few weeks... I'm going to have "mommy fail"moments, and that is okay. I'm happy and my children are happy. That is all that matters.