Friday, February 22, 2013

Birds and bees... Wha?

A few weeks ago, I was able to attend a retreat for moms (new moms, mommas with teeny things, mommas with teens, mommas with college age children, mommas who are now gran-mommas).  So, the mom pool at the retreat was all ages, and the speakers that led the discussions were wonderful.  It seemed like everything that was said or any verse that was mentioned, i was just soaking it up like a sponge!  Most importantly the focus was to build us up in our role as Christian mommas and encourage us to to get out and raise our babies to be STRONG WARRIORS for Christ.
I was completely caught off guard when the first topic of the momvo was about sexuality and sex!  I was seriously sqirmin' in my seat.  I mean, the woman leading the talk is a counselor and totally certified to have such talk, but I was like, o my word... We are in church and talking about this in a large group outside of my circle of friends!  So after my sweaty palms dried out and I quit checking out of the corner of my eye to see if anyone's mother was looking at me while i was crazily speed writin' my notes, I was able to just relax and focus on what God wanted me to hear and I just loved all that was said.  Loved it so much that I had to turn around and share what I learned.
So, the birds and the bees.... Let's start there.
So, right now, in this season of my life, I have tiny tots.  I have little to NO concern in my day that Red or Bear will be approaching me asking anything about said topic.  I mean, my babies see my bubbies and laugh, they see Aron and I hug and think its fun to push us apart so they can be the main focus of hugs and kisses... They are not dating or even interested in relationships (but, one day they will be asking questions about things and I need to be prepared to talk to them and answer some questions)!
It seems like parents are needing to begin these conversations earlier than I would have ever dreamed to discuss them. (I was thinking 18 years old we could talk dating and then on their wedding night I could give them a book or something... Ha).  But in this day that we are in sex is everywhere!!  It's on the TV ( daytime nighttime, talk shows, prime time, Springers' guests are fight in' bout it, and the reality TV shows just make it seem so cheap sad and dirty, as if sex is good to have and have it with every Tom, Dick, and Judy.  Its on billboards (women half naked shaving their legs or wearing bras/panties, its all over the magazines, its all over the music on the radio, IT IS HERE and IT IS EVERYWHERE!!
Today, sex/ sexuality is all up in our faces!  Its breaking spirits, saturating our minds, its breaking up marriages.  Satan is just loving this... I'm sure!!
Two things that were said at the retreat, that BLEW MY MIND:
A group of 100 boys (boys y'all, I'm talking junior high and high school) were asked to raise their hands if they currently, sometimes, or had ever been exposed to pornography!  Hands were flying up!  Out of that group I think they said 93 - 97 of those boys raised their hands!  Yowza!  How can that be?
The next thing that had my mouth on the floor was, "where did I learn about sex, was it a "talk" with my parents? From friends? Television?  Then I started thinking it was bits and pieces here and there.  But did you know that only 4-5% of kids learn about sex from their parents!?  What?!  So mommas.... Daddy's.... If we are not having these discussions with our kids, someone will and chances are they will not be starting off with.....Gods design for sex!
.... Do not be AFRAID!  Do not be DISCOURAGED by this mighty army, for the battle is not yours, but GOD'S!  2 Chronicles 20:15
... Satan is just waiting for your child!  He wants to trip them up!  Heck, he's waiting to trip you up!  He's looking to get any foothold into their minds and into your home!
We need, we must train our children to have a lifestyle of purity with God!!
Its time to open up the lines of communication and open your heart to them about this topic!  Also, the talk should not be a one time thing... It should be an ongoing convo.  You maybe thinking.... Um, my child isn't ready for this stuff... That's my situation.. They are toddlers, but parents underestimate their kids and what they know or don't know Or what they need to know!  Thus the 93-97 young boys a few paragraphs up.  The counselors talking said, of course you know your child and where their at... So you be the judge, but they said 7-9 years old, you should be talking about "IT"
Ugh!!  Babies... Those are little babies, 7!  I suppose the alternative to this is never discuss this topic, keep it a big mystery and let kids go and learn about it from lil Johnny or Janie down the street.??? Or not!
Most importantly they just said that your response when discussing these things is critical!  If you act strange and nervous and a little sketchy on what you'll talk about they are less likely to approach you again!  You want your kids to feel safe and that they can come to you about anything!  Let them know that your sexuality is good, it is a gift from God for you to share when in a covenant relationship.  Take care of your heart, guard it from things that are not in His image!
Be proactive about these talks!
Pray about these talks!  Pray for your children!
Be alert!!!  Know what your children are doing, who they are talking to, know what they are looking at on their phones and computers!
Be ready!!
... Love the Lord God with ALL of your HEART and with ALL your SOUL and with ALL your STRENGTH!!   These commandments that i give You today are to be on your hearts.  Impress them on YOUR CHILDREN. Talk with them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you rise! Tie them as SYMBOLS on your HANDS and bind them to your FOREHEADS.  WRITE them on the DOORFRAMES of your houses and on your GATES!!!  Deuteronomy 6:5-9

This was just the first of the "MOMVO" at the retreat!!!

No comments: